Still drafting a 600-word text to someone who replied "lol" three days ago? Ghosting people who are nice to you? Feeling safest in the arms of someone who forgets your birthday?
That's not a personality. That's code. And Dr. RAD, The Attachment Codebreaker, is here to decrypt it.
One click. Zero consent forms. Our scanner reads your nervous system through your screen and returns your attachment code. (*It's a random number generator wearing a lab coat. The real decoding happens in the newsletter.)
$ ready to scan subject... WARNING: results may be uncomfortably accurate.
"I used to think 'hot and cold' was a personality type. Turns out it's a faucet. I'm the plumber now."— Dana, 34, recovering anxious texter
"I read one issue and cried in a Trader Joe's. Ten out of ten. Would weep by the frozen dumplings again."— Marcus, 29, former "lone wolf"
"Took off one star because I felt seen and I hate that."— Avoidant reader, name withheld (obviously)
"My therapist asked who's been helping me. I said 'a Substack.' She subscribed."— Priya, 41, securely attached-ish
"I finally dated someone kind and consistent and did NOT invent a reason to leave. My mom is asking what cult I joined. It's called subscribing."— Theo, 37, formerly disorganized, now merely chaotic
That's right. Free. Like your emotions are about to be.
SIDE EFFECTS MAY INCLUDE: texting back at a normal speed, sudden boundaries, unexplained calm when someone says "we need to talk," loss of interest in emotionally unavailable musicians, involuntary self-compassion, deleting the drafts folder, saying "I need reassurance" out loud like a whole adult, sleeping through the night, recognizing your parents in your partner and calmly choosing otherwise, mild to severe secure attachment. Not available in stores. Not a substitute for therapy, medical care, or a friend who actually picks up. Dr. RAD is not responsible for exes who suddenly "just want to check in."
SIDE EFFECTS MAY INCLUDE: texting back at a normal speed, sudden boundaries, unexplained calm when someone says "we need to talk," loss of interest in emotionally unavailable musicians, involuntary self-compassion, deleting the drafts folder, saying "I need reassurance" out loud like a whole adult, sleeping through the night, recognizing your parents in your partner and calmly choosing otherwise, mild to severe secure attachment. Not available in stores. Not a substitute for therapy, medical care, or a friend who actually picks up. Dr. RAD is not responsible for exes who suddenly "just want to check in."
The Attachment Codebreaker is Dr. RAD's newsletter on why you love the way you love, and how to rewrite it. It lands straight in your inbox, which is more consistent than anyone you've ever dated.
You were getting close to something real and now you're reaching for the tab bar. Interesting. Very interesting. Dr. RAD would love to unpack that with you. For free. In your inbox.